Don't Let Meditation Intimidate You
When I start working with clients, one of the first questions I ask them is, "Do you meditate?" People either respond with something like, "I try to meditate, but know I should do it more often" or "I have tried to meditate, but cannot do it."Why are we so intimidated with meditation? I think mediation needs a rebrand. Or, at least, an explanation. Because being intimidated by the idea of meditating, really defeats the purpose. And it is keeping people from taking advantage of this incredible practice.
Meditation Myth #1
The typical meditation practice starts with sitting comfortably in a quiet place with your eyes closed. Ok, allow me to name the elephant in the room here.How many of us can sit comfortably with our eyes closed somewhere quiet? Anyone? I live in a tiny apartment with my husband, daughter and 3 dogs. In order to sit quietly, I'd have to leave my house. So, sit somewhere comfortably and let the "quietly" part be seriously optional.
Meditation Myth #2
If you don't have at least 20 minutes twice a day to meditate, it won't work. While it is true that the more you can meditate, the better, ANY AMOUNT OF TIME YOU MEDITATE COUNTS. This is like exercise. If you don't have time to do an hour workout, it still "counts" if you do 10 minutes a few times a week. Setting a bar too high too fast is a sure fire way to fail. Be patient and gentle with yourself.
Meditation Myth #3
Many people think they aren't "good at" meditating, if thoughts come into their head while they are trying to focus on their breath or a mantra, etc. Well, honestly, that is the point. Yes, that is really the point of why it is important to meditate. Getting "good at" being interrupted and realizing that life goes on helps in so many ways, it is FIERCE. Being interrupted, distracted, disagreed with, etc doesn't need to stress us out. Or make us think that "life sucks" or "I can't get my crap together" or "nothing is going my way".When you TRY to focus on your breath and a mundane thought, like doing laundry, comes in your head and you follow it for a few seconds and then think "OH NO! I'm not meditating because I'm thinking about doing laundry instead!". Well, here is the GREAT NEWS!
THE FACT THAT YOU REALIZED YOU WERE DISTRACTED IS WHAT MEDITATION IS!
So, you brush the though away and start trying to focus on your breath again and again and again and again and again. You get to know through this process, that your breath is still there. It wasn't interrupted. You were still breathing, right? So, it doesn't "suck" that you thought about your laundry when you were trying to focus on your breath, because you were still breathing. It has nothing to do with "getting your crap together" that you started thinking about laundry while trying focus on your breath, because you were still breathing. And, it isn't true that "nothing is going your way" because you are thinking about laundry when you were trying to focus on your breath, because, YES, you were still breathing.So what does that have to do with anything? PRACTICING this, makes all the other "disruptions" in your life less meaningful. Here's an example. You are on your way to work and someone cuts you off on the road or you miss the most recent subway. What is true is, you didn't expect that. What is also true is, you are still on your way to work. It was just something you didn't plan that distracted you from your focus. Meditating and getting distracted from focusing, helps you deal with real life distractions better. Yes. That is it. That is really all it is about.Focus and like a muscle you need to workout. You get better at brushing away the distractions the more you practice. Which is why you need to do it regularly. Like brushing your teeth. You don't brush you teeth once and figure they are clean for weeks, right? You don't workout for better cardio and then figure you don't have to do cardio for weeks. You don't eat broccoli once and then think you ate something healthy, so you don't have to eat healthy for weeks. You get the point.So back to Myth #1. The reason you shouldn't necessarily be in a perfectly quiet place when you are meditating, is because you will have MORE CHANCES TO PRACTICE REFOCUSING, if there are noises around you. You can notice a dog barked or a door closed or you heard someone's voice and while it may distract you, you are still breathing. You can let that noise go and start focusing again.Here's the kicker, the more you are getting distracted and realizing it, the more you are getting to practice. So you shouldn't be intimidated by the distractions. you should be grateful for them. They are like the weights in the gym. If you went to the gym to do bicep curls without a weight in your hand, it would take a really long time to see any affect. If you meditate and don't get to practice being distracted, there won't be as many chances for the practice of mediation to help you get more clear on focusing. Make that work for you. IT IS FIERCE! Does that make sense?Meditation helps with:
Reducing Stress
Increasing Focus
Improves Sleep
Improves Relationships
Improves Mood
Reduces Irritability
Reduces Aggression
Improves Job Function
Increases Exercise Frequency
Helps with Pain Management
Helps with Weight Loss
Helps with Depression
Seems worth it, right? We don't live in bubbles. Life goes on around us. People have different ideas, thoughts, emotions, agendas, problems, schedules, wants, needs from us. MORE OFTEN THAN NOT those differences are going to bump up against all of our stuff. That doesn't need to ruin you day, your life, your relationship. Just refocus. Your stuff it still your stuff. You are STILL FIERCE.If you need any guidance on getting a meditation practice going, please feel free to reach out. There are tons of apps out there. I personally favor Waking Up by Sam Harris and 10% Happier by Dan Harris. But find what works for you!I hope you found this helpful. Please share it and stay tuned for more FIERCE news coming soon.Stay FIERCE.